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  #31  
Old 10-01-2017, 12:33 PM
Spike1005 Spike1005 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flops View Post
I love my kids, but I've spent much of my life trying to figure them out. Someone once said the difference between a kid and a cat is that the cat thinks "She feeds me, she takes care of all of my needs, I must be a god", while the kid thinks "She feeds me, she takes care of all of my needs, I must be a god". Hey, hang on...that's the SAME!!! I've had all of my kids since they were born, and other people's kids since they started dating mine. The kids got me a puppy for my birthday seven years ago, but they have only a few objections and it doesn't look like they will ever move out. We have rocky moments and I often wade into arguments between two, three or four of them. Big mistake, but happily they never attack my legs. I have no physical scars from them, and I am too busy taking care of all of their needs, and playing boggle to ever spend many hours in bed. They take it in turns to do and say quite irrational things, and I don't think they will ever go away. After everything though, they are great kids.

Given the problems with trading cats & teenagers, I must agree, you are better off as you are.
I can't think of anything else to add at the moment, but also I can't tell you how much I've enjoyed this exchange. If you wrote a book about your life, I'd buy it.

Last edited by Spike1005 : 10-01-2017 at 01:21 PM.
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  #32  
Old 10-01-2017, 10:32 PM
flops flops is offline
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The whole claw theory is an interesting one...I was very taken with the idea of properly chastising kids with nice adult claws...but then remembered that properly chastising kids is generally frowned upon in civilised societies. You aren't even supposed to say "no", or even, "sorry, I can't afford that", because somewhere, someone has done a study and discovered that you will emotionally scar the little darlings with your negativity.

When my little darlings were younger, I swore them to secrecy, and informed them that I wasn't supposed to tell them because all of the other parents in the world would be very cross with me, but that, when children lie, their parents, and only their parents could see a little purple dot floating just above their head. It made the refereeing much easier, the perpertrator of (insert incident here..broken vase, sweet thief, for example) was the one hiding behind the counter/wearing a hat/had hands on their head.

Given the age of Crazykates kids, she has years of being used as a jungle gym ahead of her, so I think claws would be bad.

I don't think Caillou with scar your lil girls Crazykate, particularly if they take up the idea of having imaginary friends. Imaginary friends are waaaay cheaper to feed that real ones, and you never have to buy them birthday presents, etc. Imaginary friends are even cheaper and far easier to impress than cats.

I am pretty sure that if Spikes cats did insist on watching tv, that would be subversive.
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  #33  
Old 10-02-2017, 05:28 AM
Spike1007 Spike1007 is offline
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If we all had claws, we might never have gone quite so far in deciding that it's bad to chastise children (at least until we fitted all of them with Kevlar mittens).

I like your little purple dot plan. Does it really work? I do have a brother-in-law whose mother convinced all her kids that she'd know whether or not they were lying. I don't know if she used any special explanation for her powers.

There have been times when I'd leave the TV on all night to discourage raccoons from coming in my cat doors, eating the cat food & generally going on a rampage. For all I know, the cats would stay up & watch midnight movies (and maybe fight the raccoons for the remote).
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  #34  
Old 10-02-2017, 05:46 AM
lalatan lalatan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flops View Post
When my little darlings were younger, I swore them to secrecy, and informed them that I wasn't supposed to tell them because all of the other parents in the world would be very cross with me, but that, when children lie, their parents, and only their parents could see a little purple dot floating just above their head. It made the refereeing much easier, the perpertrator of (insert incident here..broken vase, sweet thief, for example) was the one hiding behind the counter/wearing a hat/had hands on their head.
I laughed until I wheezed when I read this! LOL
Spike's imagery of his cats fighting for the remote with racoons was great too!
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  #35  
Old 10-02-2017, 09:05 AM
flops flops is offline
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It worked exceptionally well, and I knew they were convinced because in summer when hat wearing at school is compulsory, only the innocent would allow me to remove their hat.

I was having difficulties having them brush their teeth when there was only three of them, so I used to change my shirt after dinner and arrive in the bathroom signing "Brusha, Brusha, Brusha, make the nice and clean", in an italian accent, then announce that the tooth brushing lady had arrived and would tell their mother that they had done a wonderful job, if they did, and they did.

I thought it was all just a bit of fun, considering that my whole disguise was changing my shirt (and changing it back afterward and enquiring if the tooth brushing lady had been there), until one of them put a hat on AND their hands on their head and said that she had told them they'd done a better job than their siblings. They were also very excited because tooth brushing lady was pregnant (which was true, because so was I).

There are those little moments in parenting when you wonder if you messed with their tiny little minds too much. Ultimately, they must have recovered, because as previously mentioned, they know everything.

We don't have racoons here, nor do I have cats, but from the information I have gathered from that very entertaining imagery, I think I shall have to procure both, so that someone can find the remote control.
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  #36  
Old 10-02-2017, 10:12 AM
Spike1007 Spike1007 is offline
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The problem is that, while the raccoons may find the remote control, they may not leave it anywhere you can find it. I had a spare key hidden outside (velcroed to the bottom of a post on my front porch). My cat sitter knows where it is, and uses that to let herself in when I'm out of town. The night before I left the last time a few weeks ago, I checked to make sure the key was there (I was sure I felt it) and again the next day, but by then it was definitely gone. I was afraid that someone had seen me check & had stolen it. Anyway, I replaced it & told the cat sitter that I was kind of paranoid about it being missing, and to take appropriate action (like call the police) if it looked like anyone had been inside. After I got back, everything was fine, but a few days later, I saw my new spare key across the porch from the post. It was only then I realized that some raccoon had probably found it, but dropped it before going too far, and had probably done the same thing with the previous key. God knows where it is now. I'd be more worried about the raccoons having a key, but they know where I keep the spare anyway. Also, at one time, I had a little key chain calculator. It was cheap & the display went weird, but I kept it around the house anyway, at least until I found it one day while mowing the back yard. It was nicely chewed on, but didn't really work any worse (or better) that it did before it disappeared.

You sound like a very entertaining mother, although your kids probably didn't realize that for a long time (and if you didn't warp their little minds too much). As you say, they know everything, but who knows how much of that is like the purple dot thing.
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  #37  
Old 10-02-2017, 10:46 AM
flops flops is offline
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I am constantly being introduced to new concepts here, for example, finding the remote control (even if I could, the parrots have eaten most of the rubber buttons off), and this whole key/spare key thingy. We have an open door policy here, which leads to feeding and entertaining other peoples children, and occassionally other peoples pets It was not my intent. The open door policy is literal, because it would seem that any keys that we may have once had, are holidaying with the remote control.....(I wonder if we should look in the possum nest out the front?).

When I am not slowly rocking back and forth in a corner (for various child related reasons) we entertain each other greatly, if there minds are warped , the result is quite endearing most of the time.

Given the problems in trading kids, cats, procuring racoons, finding remotes and introducing this whole key/locking the house concept, I must agree you are still better off as you are, well, I'm pretty sure.....
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  #38  
Old 10-02-2017, 11:51 AM
Spike1007 Spike1007 is offline
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I took care of a friend's parrot for a while years ago, so I understand about the missing remote buttons. I lost a few shirt buttons & snaps to him. I thought it was safe for him to play with a Bic pen until he started to dismantle it, and I was afraid he'd choke on the parts. I took off all the parts & just left him the plastic barrel. That was OK until I heard him start to break that up.

I live in a residential area of reasonably small college town, so I consider myself pretty safe, and I don't take door locking too seriously. (The only problem I ever had was my own fault, and locking doors didn't help.) In July & August, we did apparently have a group of teenagers who would rummage through unlocked cars at night looking for spare change or whatever, but that kind of thing is pretty rare (although maybe more common near the university). Some of the neighborhood raccoons actually live above my garage, and keys don't help there.

If you've warped your kids, apparently you've done it in a way that suits you. (I guess you customized them.) I think we are better off with what we have (whatever we might occasionally wish to change).
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  #39  
Old 10-02-2017, 09:20 PM
crazykatePremium Member crazykate is offline
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I have to say, I wanted to join your playful conversation, but I find myself hugely entertained by reading it and don't think I could contribute similarly humorous anecdotes from my own experiences. I'm taking a copious amount of mental notes though. Carry on.
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  #40  
Old 10-02-2017, 10:13 PM
crazykatePremium Member crazykate is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flops View Post

I don't think Caillou with scar your lil girls Crazykate, particularly if they take up the idea of having imaginary friends. Imaginary friends are waaaay cheaper to feed that real ones, and you never have to buy them birthday presents, etc. Imaginary friends are even cheaper and far easier to impress than cats.

I am pretty sure that if Spikes cats did insist on watching tv, that would be subversive.
I'm not that worried about Caillou scarring my kids (that would be like being beaten to death with a pink fuzzy slipper... Pretty difficult to achieve.) Rather, I think that show is a little *too* sugar-coated even for two-year-olds. I mean, the parents are constantly happy, even when they're sick or injured, they can fix any problem within minutes, and little sister's favourite word is "okay". My littler one's favourite words are "no", "mine" and "Maaaaamaaaa!!!"
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